There are no Fools so Troublesome ...

... As Those that Have Wit. 

-Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard (1741)  

I haven't done a post like this in quite a while, but I think today is quite fitting to discuss one of THE most idiotic things I've done in the name of beauty, preservation, self-care, and vanity.  I think it's safe to say, at one time or another, we've all been fools when it comes to (no matter how you slice it) clinging to our youth.  

First things first: This post is going to be packed with shop-able links, many from which I'll get a little kickback if you decide to make any purchases, read more here: FTC Affiliate Disclosure.  You'll notice, I don't do the whole clickable ad thing here, and I don't clutter each of my posts with them either.  Personally, I haaaaate trying to read something saturated with links to unrelated nonsense fighting for my attention, slowing down / crashing the page, not to mention the havoc it brings on mobile devices, and the frustration of trying to dodge pop-up windows like Neo vs. The Bullets.  Anyway, I try to do things a little differently over here that lets both of us (the reader, and the writer) be a lot more intentional with our time, and how we experience the internet. 

So, let's get into it!

This whole thing starts a few years ago with one of my girl friends singing the praises of at-home dermaplaning ... Which is just a fancy way of saying shaving your face.  I was more than skeptical at first.  I know it's a myth that shaved hair grows back in thicker - they say it's just the blunt edge of the hair poking through the skin as it grows back that makes it look larger than when hair grows in without being disturbed.  Cool, cool.  Great.  But one of my best friends in high school used to remove her upper lip hair, and let me tell ya, Lady had full-on poky, thick-in-diameter patchy stubble by 5th period English, whereas if she just left it alone, it was a soft peach fuzz that no one ever cared about.  To say I wasn't exactly jumping off the starting line to try this "new" procedure, is a total understatement.  The more my friends swore up and down that it's just about exfoliation, I dug in my heels, relaying the horror stories of my youth in order to convince others that this was entirely the wrong move... 

Surprise, surprise, we all buckled and ended up trying it anyway.  

I held out as long as I could, and no one is more surprised than I am that I finally succumbed to peer-pressure at middle age!  But here we are, and reader, when I tell you what an absolute mistake it was, I— 

I completely destroyed my skin's natural barrier.  Now, I know this isn't going to be everyone's skin reaction, but it certainly was mine.  I also know I won't be the only one.  

Throughout my teen years, I never really experienced true breakouts, not like what other kids had to endure anyway.  The college years were another story, between stress, and treating my stomach like the dumpster behind a Wendy's, let's just say my choices had a way of showing up in unglamorous ways.  Through it all though, my skin has never been particularly sensitive, and if there's ever a problem it typically heals surprisingly fast, leaving me woefully unprepared for what happened at the end of last year, and thoroughly clueless when it came to fixing the problem.  

Long story short, I bought the silly razors, and shaved dermaplaned my face at the beginning of last November.  My skin was clean (and displaying no active breakout), my razor was clean, and I used a serum to enhance the glide of the razor.  Perfect execution.  The results were alright ... Nothing I'd write home about.  I mean, I'm vain as hell, but I've never been particularly insecure about my peach fuzz.  Facial hair is a natural part of being a human, and I'm not exactly rocking a full pelt, so I've just never been all that worried about it.  After the deed was done, I could, however, appreciate the clean canvas it left me, and I definitely understand how it would appeal to the Product Princesses and beauty influencers out there as far as make-up application is concerned.  But again, for me, I didn't have such a drastic difference that I could imagine making dermaplaning a significant part of my routine.  Good thing.  

Almost immediately, my face just felt different.  No, not aerodynamic.  Not razor burn.  Just, wrong.  I refrained from using any hair products, and made sure to use fresh pillow cases, didn't slather my face with products rocking a bunch of perfumes, dyes, or active ingredients, and yet by the end of the week, my forehead was in a FULL breakout like I've rarely seen, and absolutely never experienced before.  Full disclosure, my chin and neck weren't lookin' so hot either, but I just thought I'd use all of my old regular face gunk, and get everything under control in a couple of days.  Bingo, bango, right?

WRONG.  

This breakout starting around November 5th lasted unchanged (no matter what I tried) until the middle of January.  For three months my skin was so red and angry, there wasn't one space on my forehead where I could've put a finger and touched anything flesh-colored.  My face was entirely inflamed.  I had l-a-y-e-r-s of zits ... Like, sheets of them stacked on top of each other.  I could literally see more forming under the ones that were already fully developed and making my life a living hell.  I felt like I'd taken up permanent residence at Sores and Boils Alley, and I was never coming back home again.  

The worst part wasn't even how horrible I looked, it was the constant pain, and itchiness, and the fact that not a single thing I was doing was helping to solve the problem in the slightest that was fundamentally the most crazy-making aspect of it all.  And so it went until one night, I gently steamed my face with a warm rag, smeared on a gentle moisturizer, slammed a couple of ibuprofen tablets, and crawled into bed to do a little doom-scrolling before the sweet oblivion of sleep took me out of my misery ... That's when I saw her.  My Skin Savior.  She compiled an Instagram reel with photos of itchy, painful, out of control breakouts that nothing seems to help, and single-handedly taught me how to fix it. 

AND IT WORKED!

Granted, nothing about this process was an overnight success, but it did start working immediately.  Like, obviously working ... No mistaking that it's working, working.  

Here's how I fixed my face:

First, a gentle cleanser.  I don't have a specific one to share with you right now, because even after all of these years I still have not found one I'm in love with.  I have heard great things about both La Roche-Posay Toleriane Purifying Foaming Cleanser, and CeraVe Renewing SA Cleanser, but I have yet to try either of these, and won't link to them until I know for sure they're awesome.

Next, pat your face dry with a clean cloth, and definitely not the hand towel that's been marinating on the hook in your bathroom for days.

To tone, or not to tone.  For the first couple of weeks, I chose not to use a toner because I wanted to reduce the amount of products, and ingredients I was putting on my face.  I wanted just the absolute essentials necessary to bring my skin back into balance without it having to constantly decide how to react to this concoction, and that.  However, when I did choose to reintroduce toner into my routine, it was the tremendously gentle Quinn's Unscented Alcohol-Free Witch Hazel Toner.

This toner is mild enough that I would even recommend it as Baby's First Toner for teens & tweens ... it's nothing like the Sea-Breeze most of us were burning our faces off with at that age!  Quinn's also didn't further irritate my broken skin as it was attempting to heal, even though it was helping me slough off and remove some of the damaged and dead skin, and scabs that were being replaced by new, healthy skin underneath.  It made it nice that I didn't have to go around with sickening flakes all over my face, but I didn't have to further abrade my face by scrubbing them off.  

Now the fun part!  Repairing my skin's barrier with Axis-Y Artichoke Intensive Skin Barrier Ampoule.  This stuff may as well have been made with unicorn tears, because it is pure magic!!  After applying (do not be afraid to use a generous amount!), my skin instantly felt soothed ... That alone was a huge advancement after months of inflammation, and discomfort.  It restored my hope well before it restored my skin, both of which had taken a massive hit throughout this whole ordeal.  I will probably keep this product in my beauty bag for the rest of my life, and I'm not exaggerating even in the slightest.  It's that good.  Once my face is back to normal, I don't envision using this every day, but it will certainly be on heavy rotation in my routine going forward.  

The next most important item in the lineup is the Axis-Y Heartleaf My Type Calming Cream.  I thought this was bogus, too, at first, but it got to work straight away removing redness, swelling, irritation, and the size of the zits I was trying to get rid of.  This is by far the most noticeable when you put it on right before bed and let it get to work during your body's natural repair cycle.  I woke up with incredible results just after the first application.  Again, it was not a fairy tale, or instant perfection, but it played a huge part in my happily ever after, and will be another product I'll keep in my bag forever.  I can't sing this cream's praises enough, I mean imagine going for 2-3 months with NOTHING working ... Not a single thing, and then in one round of use this stuff is making a massive visible improvement ... The relief of just feeling like you're finally on the right track is enough to make me want to buy stock in the company, but watching the results roll in day, after day, after day improving more with each application I mean, to the date I am typing this I continue to be blown away.

Alright, now that you've got your face slathered (truly, don't be stingy) with the stuff that's gonna fight like hell to bring your skin back into balance, you are free to apply your favorite eye cream.  Throughout this new process, it's important to remove irritating products, or things with a lot of active ingredients from the areas of your face experiencing the freak-out, since this most likely isn't happening in and around your eye area, you can still use your old faves here.  I always reach for a little pot of Clinique Smart Clinical Repair Wrinkle Correcting Eye Cream.  I like that it's creamy, yet light weight, and doesn't smell like anything, and doesn't burn or irritate the delicate skin under, and around my eyes.  

I personally don't usually have a problem with under-eye puffiness, so I can just grease up & go, but if you've got some bags you'd like to shrink, Instant FIRMx Temporary Eye Tightener by Peter Thomas Roth is pretty amazing.  On the occasion that I do wake up with a little extra fluff under my eyes, this gel takes it right down!  This would also be part of your morning routine, and not your bed-time-break-out-repair routine, unless you're trying to look your best for Mr. Sandman, then do your thing, baby!

Once your eyes are handled, if you have highly visible sebaceous filaments (little dark spots on your nose) like I do, then this trick is for you.  Take a small amount of La Roche-Posay Cicaplast Balm B5 and rub it in all over the top of your schnoz.  This treatment will make your filaments appear smaller, giving your skin a more even look.  Some people use this as their last step, and put it over their normal moisturizer.  I don't.  I find that once I've applied this I don't want another moisturizer over, or under it.  Some people also apply this balm to their chin area as well.  I've tried this, and while it does work, I don't love it, and that very well may be due to the fact that I'm using the wrong cleanser with it.  Time will tell.  I also have a small patch of larger-looking pores on either side of my nose that I've spread this balm to, and that I did love!  It made them seem to disappear altogether, and that was a welcome surprise.  Overall, it's up to you how you want to use it, but be aware that this is a lil dab'll do ya situation, and it CAN cause breakouts for some people, so if you're not in the headspace to experiment with something that may worsen a current problem you're dealing with, maybe skip this step for now!

Next, it's time to get a serious coating of moisturizer spread all over your face (excluding the eye area, and nose for me).  Do not be shy!  This has always been my problem, but mainly because it's taken me my entire life to find a moisturizer that doesn't make me feel like I've been dipped into a vat of Crisco.  I've always used the tiniest amount of moisturizer possible, because I've never had particularly dry skin (the only people I mistakenly believed needed moisturizer to begin with), and I couldn't keep my makeup in place over the top of it, but if I've learned nothing else from the Korean beauty sector, it's that moisture is the most important aspect of having clear skin for ALL skin types.  Period.  And it seems the more you slosh on, the better.  Even if you think your skin is too oily to need a moisturizer, if you find the right formula, and the right quality of product, it will reduce your natural oil production and leave you with soft, supple skin without adding to the grease-factor.  The one I love for night time is the MIZON All In One Snail Repair Cream.  I get mine in a two-pack, and wait for the price to drop to around $13-15 (and it will drop!).  For my budget, that's an awesome price to pay for something that actually works, and feels like liquid silk when I apply it, and literally nothing a few moments later.  Win / Win / Win.  

*Warning: Folks with shellfish allergies may want to exercise caution when trying any snail repair products.  Some shellfish allergies are contained to certain species, but it's best to proceed carefully.

For day wear, I prefer Clinique Moisture Surge.  Again, it's fragrance free, light weight, feels just as silky soft as the MIZON cream, but upon dry down it feels like it has a little more "grip" to it, and helps my makeup stay where I put it.  I have used Clinique products in one form or another since seventh grade.  It was kind of like a rite of passage at the start of Junior High to be taken to the Clinique counter, and have all the ladies in white lab coats fuss over you, and pick out the things that you'd "need" for the school year; maybe you'd come away with a foundation, or concealer, perhaps both, a tube of Black Honey almost lipstick, and a tiny jar of Dramatically Different Moisturizing Lotion, and of course, your free-gift-with-purchase.  As fun as it was, it surely did not convert me to sycophant status.  In fact, I hate that moisturizer, I'm not bowled over by any of their cleansers, or toners, I can't stand the smell of Happy, and after decades of rocking Black Honey, now it just looks orange on my lips.  BUT.  I love Moisture Surge 100H Auto-Replenishing Hydrator.  Same with the eye cream I mentioned above.  And I'm always going to be a sucker (even if only based on nostalgia) for their free gifts, which has me continuing to shop their catalog through a department store like Macy's, Dillard's, Belk, or Boscov's and the like even though it was just announced last week that Clinique was making its debut on Amazon.com.  I clicked around, and so far see no way to obtain the much coveted, constantly rotating free gift.  Until this major faux pas is rectified I can't see myself riding that hype train just yet.  Plus, I don't envision being able to make the kind of scores on Amazon that I can through department stores when the stars align by combining major blow-out sales with stackable free gifts.  Amazon is going to have to majorly roll out the red carpet to tear me away from being able to cop hundreds of dollars worth of cosmetics and skincare for 35-50 bucks!  Prime shipping isn't the little darling that it used to be, and having a Clinique page hosted on the site isn't tremendously more convenient for me as a shopper, but we'll see how it plays out.  If they can offer sales that other stores, including Clinique's homepage won't, then maybe it'll be worth it in the long run.

Okay, so now that my breakout has finally calmed down, I can go back to using my Tree of Life Retinol
Serum without it exacerbating the problem.  I had only kind of started using it in my pre breakout era, so I don't have a lot of experience with it, and have just recently reintroduced it to my routine in the last couple of weeks.  What I do know is that I like it better than the TruSkin Vitamin C-Plus Super Serum I was using before ... The first bottle they sent me was chunky and expired, and the second left a lot to be desired.  Granted it has over twelve THOUSAND reviews, and a 4.5 star rating, which isn't exactly the easiest thing in the world to maintain, so they obviously have many, many happy customers, I just happen to not be one of them.  In fact, in a head to head battle, I would choose Tree of Life every time, and if it wasn't available, I'd go without.  

Tips & Tricks

I don't have a lot to add here, but I have to say as you're dealing with a horrendous breakout that you can NOT get cleared up, never wash your face with HOT water.  You do not need to steam the living bejeezus out of your face to clean it.  It's not helping, and you are honestly just going to damage your skin further, and likely increase the duration of the breakout.

Second, we live in the real world.  Most of us are not Influencers.  We do not get paid to sit and rub things on our faces, and letting it all dry whilst capturing, and editing footage, and mapping out posts, product reviews & SEO.  We need our skincare to work on our timeline, not the other way around.  For me, even though I lived my entire teens and twenties not stepping foot outside without full hair & makeup, I am not someone who enjoys being chained to a mirror, and I had my lewk dialed in to take 20 minutes or less, so it was a bit of a horror to me to think about adding 4.5 new steps to my skincare routine and doing it twice a day ... Coupled with the AMOUNTS of product we're supposed to be using these days, like, my 1990s self would recoil in full panic if she saw the blob of moisturizer I use today.  And lemme tell ya, this shit takes time to dry!  And you can't start the next product application without the first layer being dry, and so on, and so forth until you're locking it all in with your night cream ... Or, you know, just go ahead and TRY putting foundation on top of a wet face, and see what that gets you!  My solution?  A cheap, albeit sequinned, folding fan of course!
 

Now, you can go a couple of ways with these, but I prefer the dramatic C R A C K of the folding fan.  I like that they're cheap, and I can get a whole multicolor box of them, and have them stashed around the house and in purses and bags for times when I need a little gust of cool air, and judging by the reviews they're a real life-saver during peri-menopause, so that's another thing to look forward to!  Anyway, yes.  They're tacky, and ridiculous, and I do walk around fanning my face while I make a hot morning beverage, or get breakfast started, or sometimes I just stand in the bathroom singing into the mirror: SHE AIN'T NO DIIIIIVAAAAAAAA...  And okay, yes it's things like this that make people think I'm high maintenance.  However, after you've lived with throbbing pustules all over your face for months on end, you kind of don't care what anyone else calls it.  I call it solution based problem solving (and maintaining a sense of humor).

So I dig the analog version, but for my gadget girlies out there, you may prefer the portable, battery operated, USB rechargeable Tripole Handheld Mini Personal Fan instead!  And honestly, what's not to love?  It even LOOKS a bit like a microphone, I may just have to pick one up for my powder room concert sessions just in case (and they come in a bunch of cute colors, I think I might let myself get a little bit obsessed!).  The thing about growing up is, on the one hand you no longer have the skin of a twenty year old, but you're arguably more comfortable in it than you ever have been (yes, even when you have weeping lesions all over your face), and you embrace with both arms the notion of letting yourself be a little bit extra, especially when it makes your life easier.  So you buy the silly fans to dry the goop on your face between skincare steps, and you sing the songs, and do the shoulder shimmies to make yourself laugh through it all, and you wear the faux fur trimmed bathrobe in one size too big because it makes you feel like royalty, and you heal the parts of you that need healing, and you share the things you learn along the way.  And you shout out the people who helped get you there!  In this instance, Lisa Baisl @lisa.beautify and Natalie O'Neill @natalieoneilllll both of whom are on Instagram, and both of whom helped me save my face ... Gratitude doesn't even begin to cover what I feel for these young women.  They are an absolute blessing, and have restored my faith that the Influencer Economy doesn't have to be built on lies, and have a seedy underbelly to thrive.  I mean, it's always going to have its problems, but I really hope more and more people follow in their footsteps and commit to publishing useful, honest information that ultimately helps people change their lives in ways both great, and small.  That's my wish at least!  

Anyway, that's all for now, and truly, if you're having a problem with your skin, or you're just deep in a skincare rut, go look these gals up and get yourself sorted, you'll definitely thank yourself later!

xoxo