Burn, Baby Burn

Twin flames definitely exist. So do liars, and manipulators who shape situations to appear to be random, or fated-to-happen because of some cosmic guiding force. Being re-located for work, and running into a long lost lover, or childhood sweetheart is a lot different, to me at least, than stalking social media, and learning a person's patterns in order to place yourself on their path to have a seemingly uncalculated meet-cute, just to say "Look, proof! Twin flames! I knew it all along!" 

Don't do that.  It's creepy.

On top of that there's the crowd who over-exaggerate their love-lives to make it all sound so much more fantastical, and exciting than it really is in order to feed a severe hunger for attention, adoration, and admiration from their peers. So it's little wonder that it's a bit of a minefield out there. And it's also why I'm not quick to believe every gum smacking girl who, like, totally has a tubular twin flame, and somejunk.

Not every love is going to be a "twin flame" type of love, and nothing's wrong with that. All this fad-language has taught me is that it's got everyone all hyped up over something many may never even experience in this life (and feeling bad about themselves and their situation if they don't). Right now it's twin flames, and before that everyone was on a wild goose chase for a soul mate. I can't wait for the next New Age "thought leader" to coin a term for the thing that will be even GREATER than twin flames, so everyone can ditch this ideology, and flock to the new shiny word, and then start feeling bad about themselves and circumstances because they don't have a "Dinglehopper Dick" yet, or whatever it'll be called. I mean, it's starting to look like a page out of the Star-belly Sneetches' Playbook at this point with people frantically searching for one thing, while getting bored, and cashing in something perfectly good in the meantime. When did just falling / being in, and experiencing plain old love become not good enough?  When did love become so ordinary we decided we needed to create a new term?  

Love, real love, is absolutely radical.

With nearly every single love-experience being labeled "twin flame" it makes me doubt just how many people have ever actually experienced love at all. To me, it's not something that has to be dressed up, upgraded, or made to look any better than it already is. Love is perfection as is (that's not to say perfect love = perfect relationship), and anything less is infatuation, or lust. Not that I think the twin flame journey is just a dressed up version of love, it's that I think a lot of girls who talk about it describe it that way, as if it's actual love, but it's a little more like love holding a Balenciaga bag.

It's not that I don't believe. I do. I also believe in love at first sight, and all the other ooey-gooey good stuff. I just think I need taller boots sometimes to wade through all of the manure, especially within the self-help community, and soul vibe-y online magazines.  I also don't fully understand why anyone would want to pretend or convince themselves that they're having a Twin Flame experience anyway?  If you have one, or you've read enough about it you know it's a lot of hard work, a lot of forced introspection, and oftentimes (especially if you're fighting the growth) a lot of frustration.  Maybe people cling to the hope that the label offers in order to explain their own hardships, pain, or confusion that are sometimes present in adult relationships.  Perhaps it hurts less, or is somehow comforting to believe the dysfunction is connected to a higher purpose, or greater plan.  All I have to say to that is: Love doesn't hurt.  

Blame it on the Boogie

Windows down, sound up

Morning commute block party

Dancing back to life

Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough

What is it that keeps you from moving forward, moving out, moving on, or moving up?  What is stopping you from moving into the person you're meant to be?  Moving to another country?  Moving away from toxic employment?  Moving toward your dreams?  Moving in synchronicity with the beating of your heart?  Move-ing (full stop)?

I suppose, for most of us it must come down to one of two reasons.

1. Fear

2. Physical impairment

(and possibly some mixture of the two).

As human beings go, I know we're pretty talented at cooking up any number of obstacles to any number of advancements we want, or need to make.  Once we strip away all of the stories we tell ourselves about what stands in our way, however, I think we really are only left with the two above choices.  And once that has been revealed we are exponentially closer to doing something about it ... I think this is when that whole, "...grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference," thing comes into play.

For me, personally, it's never been a matter of courage.  I don't like change simply because I don't like to be inconvenienced, but it's never been rooted in the nastiest of all four-letter-words:

Here and Now

This place where you are right now

God circled on a map for you.

Wherever your eyes and arms and heart can move

Against the Earth and sky,

The Beloved has bowed there

Our beloved has bowed there

knowing

You were coming.

-Hafiz

That's High Priestess, To You

Ten years ago I became an ordained minister ... I think I had grand plans of becoming a Reiki Master or something, but in my state in order to legally put your hands on people in a business setting you have to either be licensed in the field of medicine, massage therapy, cosmetology (aesthetician / esthetician, etc.), or a member of the clergy.  Looking at that list, I think the obvious choice presented itself quite clearly.

A few minutes later, I became High Priestess Stormy of the Holy-Rolling Order of the Whore of Babylon (as I'm sure some would see it).

I never did end up getting my Reiki black belt, or whatever it is you do get upon ascension through all of the levels of training, but I am available for marryin' & buryin' (and I'll give you a great rate if they're both on the same day!) just don't call me for your vow renewal.  If you didn't mean it the first time, don't waste my time on a dog and pony show.

Turn the Beet Around!

After compiling last year's list of the 15 Seeds to Order and Sow Now, I've narrowed down, and decided on the varieties I'll be planting in my beds this year for a fall-winter harvest. 

Arugula
Beets
Broccoli
Brussels Sprouts
Kale
Leeks
Spinach
Swiss Chard

The key is getting your seeds in the ground a full 2 months before the first frost hits in your region, so right now in the PNW is the perfect time to start turning your soil, clearing spent plants you won't be using for seed saving, and adding any composted material to your garden!

xoxo

Real + Fake

"Let me tell you about an incredible marketing opportunity to sell cool products, make fast cash, and alienate all of your friends from high school." 

- Not A Wolf

First of all, the whole MLM (multi-level marketing) or "network marketing" (as they prefer to be called) scheme has lost its flavor with me, and gone the way of all of the other in-home-party businesses.  I find them both sketchy, and completely antiquated.  The fact that it can now be done from behind the comfort of a computer screen doesn't make it any more modern, or palatable to me.  I don't care if it's pants that stretch fourteen sizes, or housewares, or essential oils, skincare, make-up, candles, smokeless candles, just the wax formerly used in candles now warmed in a little light-up dish ... If I have to join a "team" to do it?  Thanks, but no.

Fresh Start: Be Your Own Guru!

  Part Four:

Meet your body exactly where it is right now.

If you can't pencil yourself into your own life, then where can you?

I think one of the most difficult parts of the healing journey, but arguably the most important is the willingness, and the necessity of meeting your body exactly where it is right now, and not allowing yourself to be long-term discouraged by its current limitations, but also recognizing the need to not push your body to do what it simply can not in the moment (which is the surest path to burn-out).  Often times when people are ill or overwhelmed, you'll hear the advice "slow down" thrown around with abandon, but what many well-intentioned, able bodied, or physically well people who impart this wisdom forget or simply don't understand is what an utter hellscape the notion of "slowing down" seems like.

There are few things that sound more nightmare-ish than that to someone who's ever been bed ridden, or housebound for any length of time due to insufficient health, and just now feel like they're coming back to life out of some pseudo-zombie-state.  "You can't be serious!  IF I MOVED ANY MORE SLOWLY, I'D BE GOING BACKWARDS!!!" is how I think a lot of people feel when confronted with that particular piece of advice, and I also think it throws a little undue mental anguish into the mix on top of already being unwell, which I believe makes it easier to slip into depression, feel frustratingly discouraged, deflated, and adds to the difficulty of getting oneself on a path toward total wellness.  Which, if you've ever experienced anything that had you laid up, a mystery illness you've had to unravel, or simply had shoddy healthcare that kept you in a holding pattern of sorts, you know full well how tremendously terrible a set-back like that can feel, and the toll it can take on an already delicate physical state.  Naturally, when working on clawing your way out of the grips of a health scare or crisis, we can expect a certain amount of the doldrums to hit us from time to time, but keeping yourself from spiraling into severe depression can feel like an exhausting full-time job sometimes, and it's incredibly easy for something so small, and spoken in complete innocence to disrupt the delicate balance we've been able to miraculously achieve.

It's for these reasons that I prefer to approach my wellness by respecting my body, and its wisdom by bringing it a question instead of a direct order, and why when your feet hit the ground each morning (or not, depending on your situation), I think you should ask yourself "What am I going to do today?" and let your response back to yourself be, "I'm going to meet my body exactly where it is, right now," and whatever, and wherever that place happens to be, I hope you will remember to bring the gift of kindness for yourself.

- Part One - Part Two - Part Three -